Tuesday, 14 June 2016

Lifestyle // Why do I suffer from anxiety?

Hey there! So recently I have been reflecting about why I suffer from anxiety (if you didn't know I suffer from anxiety I wrote a post about it that you can check out here). I wanted to write a post about it because one of the reasons I started a blog was to use it as a platform to express my feelings, especially ones I want to express but not know who to or how. This was also an off the bat kind of post I had an urge to write.

So why do I suffer from anxiety?
In reality, I don't think I know the actual answer but I have been reflecting about why I get anxious. I am a pessimist. That's the honest truth. I don't have much faith in myself and doubt my abilities. I pretty much set myself up to fail really because I tell myself I am going to fail. I don't fail, obviously, but no matter how well I do I always think I'm going to do badly. I also judge myself too harshly as I measure myself against other people. I know there's always going to be someone better than you but if I get a 2.1 for an assignment and someone else gets a first then I will put myself down about it and believe that they are better than me. It's unfair to myself but I kind of feel like I'm not that good because I would be getting firsts if I was as good as everyone else.
I also worry a lot. I think this is more of a result of anxiety than a cause of it but in a way it is a cause as well because the more I worry about things the more anxious I get. I worry about things that might not even happen or I worry about things that have already happened and I cannot change the outcomes. An example of this was when I submitted an essay for uni and my similarity report came back unusually high, I was so worried about it that I had convinced myself I was going to get done for plagiarism! Again, I didn't, obviously, but that shows how extreme my worries can be.
So that's why I feel are the reasons I am anxious. Like I said I wouldn't say I know the root cause of it but these reasons obviously don't help. If you have anything to say, feel free to post in the comments.
Thanks for reading!
Abbie. X

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